All Things Considered

I was hoping that I would start my blog with what an eye opening experience I had today, I am now fully enlightened and charged for the cause....but that's just not true.  First off, it took me a few hours to well up the energy and desire to take the train for 40 minutes to go to Zuccotti Park.  It wasn't because I didn't want to go, but I had a lot of coffee this morning and it was very difficult for me to calm down and quiet my brain.  We can say I had a lot of "zenning" to do before I felt comfortable leaving.  I smoked a bowl, to level me out, and made the journey.  Its only one train and about a 7 minute walk, it was a nice evening and I do love seeing Ground Zero at night time.   So finally around 6 I arrive at the park wide eyed with an open mind.  


The park is small but filled to the brim with hopeful faced protesters.  There was a very large crowd gathered at the entrance on Broadway.  There was a choir standing on the stairs and some strange man, who by the way he was dressed, I am assuming was a pastor of some kind(but the kind of pastor on late night evangelical shows), speaking to the crowd.  They were doing the whole "human microphone" thing, where one person speaks and the crowd mimics back.  From where I was standing I could see the crowd pretty well, and almost hear what the Protesting Pastor had to say, but not quite.  This microphone is good at building drama, but not exactly effective for getting speeches across unless you are within about 20 feet.  I strained to hear, or at least understand the essence of the message just through the blissful looks on peoples faces, but still nothing.  Then they started singing, a great choir, singing a song they had written about the protest.  One thing I can say, I am a sucker for a good sing a long, so I almost let myself be swept away, almost.  


I waited and watched the crowd for as long as I could until I gave in to the fact that it was futile to try and gain any understanding in this way.  I broke away and wandered through the tent city that is now set up in the park.  This was a pleasant surprise I must say.  From my Mom's recounting of the Occupy LA crowd, they smell like shit, they piss all over the lawn and kill the grass.  She works at City Hall and looks at them everyday, so I trust her on this one.  Occupy Wall Street is a startlingly clean, well organized, efficient group of hippies if I may say so myself.  And don't give me any of this "They aren't all hippies" bullshit.  I was there, I was watching, the main organizational scheme is setup by a group that I know must have narrowed it down after many a "Burning Man".  They have compost, a sanitary area, they have a kitchen going making food for everyone, I see that someone had donated pizza, they had an impressive stock of food, and all of it cleaner than most of the city.  I have to hand it to those at the core of this movement, they built the community fast. 


I walked deeper and deeper into it, which was strange because there was tons of people walking around, as you follow the path through the park, you are surrounded on all sides by campers.  Tents, tarps, boxes, whatever, these people are sure as shit living there.  And from the looks of it, they could stay there until it snows.  I tried to ignore the vast amounts of people I saw plugging away on their ipads and ibooks, as I was determined to not let my opinions get the best of me, but some of those people had impeccable gear. Trustafarians is I guess the word the kids use now.  Trust fund kids trying to squeeze their way into the 99%, eager to be a part of something besides their Daddy's Country Club.  Either way, for the most part I was deeply impressed at their gusto and efficiency.  Also it was very diverse.  All types of people, old, young, black, white, you name it.  But as I am realizing in the Realism vs.  Idealism battle I have waging in my head, I felt like this glimpse of utopia was just too good to be true.  


"This is just the beginning." I swear to Jeebus I have heard that shit like 50 times today.  It's true.  It is the beginning.  But beginning of what? The beginning to a solution? The beginning to a bigger problem? The beginning of the end?  I believe it is all of the above.  I went around the park quite a few times, happening to bump into a former friend who also happens to be one of the most useless, noncontributing, free hand out looking mother fuckers I have met while in NY.  I started to feel the gnaw of opinion and generalization in the back of my mind, but I just kept on walking, making sure to read all the signs on the way.  Some messages spoke to me, the sense of community was beautiful, the passion was palpable, but still, something just didn't feel right.  That is the feeling I have had this whole time, the unexplainable gut feeling you get with something is "off".  After I had meandered through the groups a little bit, I made my way back to the crowd I had started off watching.  They were still singing, and chanting(not to be confused with the strange creepy hippies who were also singing and chanting, but to an alter and while wearing turbans), and trying to get people amped.  Then I started to notice a tear in the crowd.  Some people were starting to grow more agitated and aggressive, they started their own chants, and shouted their own opinions.  Some were ready to rage, tired of this passive sitting and singing, they wanted to get crazy.  It made me smile.  


This, I believe will be the undoing of the whole thing.  Eventually this unity is going to have to split.  Not even in half, but into quarters, and tenths. One of the main criticisms of this movement is its lack of direction.  That was actually part of what I agreed with in terms of the protest.  No one having to be right, no one having to be in charge, or say their point is the most important, it was just everyone, being pissed about the state of things.  Now don't get me wrong, I think a lot of people are confused about my opposition, its not that I think the people are wrong, I think it has been a long time coming.  I for one have been waiting on a Revolution since before I could vote, I am happy the rest of the world finally woke the fuck up.  I just believe that sitting around in a park and eating fucking Vegan Food Not Bombs handout meals is not the way to go.  I think people should be more angry.  If I had lost my house and my job, I'd be furious as shit.  


But this is where the rift in the movement will come.  Those "in charge" today spoke of a meeting scheduled for tomorrow morning where a committee will sit and they will draft up a list of actual demands.  Now what makes anyone think this is going to work out all nice and tidy like? Someone is going to have to be in charge, but they don't want for anyone to be in charge, also, everyone has their own idea of what is the most important cause is,  who decides what the demands are?? Unanimous vote in a crowd full of strangers?  If it were that easy we'd be living in the goddamn Garden of Eden right now.   Also, the tension between those who are ready for the Loud and Hard Revolution, and those who are content to just "Occupy".  


One of the things I noticed and found most amusing about the whole thing is that when the Occupiers were chanting and singing and doing that jazz hand thing that signifies deaf people clapping, a Revolutionary would start chanting something a little more intense, something a little more forceful, the  Occupiers would actually turn around and start throwing dirty looks and shushing them.  I almost laughed out loud.  There is already civil unrest in their self built Utopia, what chance to do they have against "The Man"???  I believe change is possible when the government takes this shit seriously.  They aren't going to take anything seriously until something is on fire and people are running or fighting for their lives.  You all saw what the NYPD is capable of.  They did that shit on purpose.  Pepper spray a few protesters, treat 'em like wild animals, and it sure quieted their asses down didn't it? Got people running around using their camera phones as weapons.  Cops display a massive presence at every event, and they are not scared.  If they aren't scared, I guarantee Mr. Joe Shmoe Billionaire on the 88th floor looking down isn't scared either.  


I really did try and be subjective, and I do have a new found respect for a lot of the people that were down there.  The resourcefulness and commitment alone was more than I expected, but over all, I did not find myself moved, or persuaded.  I really wanted that feeling of unity with my fellow man and all that, I really did, its my generation and I feel cut off not being a part of it.  Although at the same time, I feel like I'm ready for the part of this protest that these others haven't even considered yet.  I am ready for the mayhem, I am ready for the panic.  All these shushing ass passive hippies, Trustafarians and crusty punk rock children are not going to be ready for Martial Law.  Not ready at all.  Surviving in a park is not the same as surviving in a world that you wanted to see built up from scratch.  


You want your utopia? You better be willing to kill for it, because that's they only way its gonna go down.  You want a restructure? You want the shift of wealth to change? Someone else is going to have to be in charge.  You are going to have to trust each other.  And I feel the same way about this as I do the bible.  In it, God says you should never trust man, because man is inherently sinful, yet man wrote the bible, so how can you believe it? "The people" say they have the solution, "The People" have the ideas and demands that are gonna turn this country right around an get it back on the right track?  Well who the fuck are these people? I believe this country was founded and built by people who were tired of being oppressed, so they moved away to somewhere else, declared it free and then slowly but surely oppressed the hell out of it anyways.  History is doomed to repeat itself, so I just fail to see the entire point of this.  We were built on capitalism, capitalism will be sure to take us down.  Maybe if all you hopeful singing chanters are lucky, one of our many enemies will bomb the shit out of us and take out 3/4 of the population, then you can commune all you fucking want.  Start from scratch.  Build your own society.


In conclusion, I will return to Zuccotti Park, I will continue to watch it unfold, I will read their signs and shake my head at half naked dancing hippies.  I went with an open mind, but for now, my mind is made up.  If you don't like it, I really don't give a fuck.  If you think I'm apathetic, I don't give a fuck about that either. I have been against banks, the media and all that shit forever.  I don't feel passion or empathy for people rubbing their eyes like babies waking from a nap.  Looking up at "The Man" and pointing fingers, "Hey! You tricked me! You took my money! I've been duped and now I'm pissed!".  Duh humans.  Duh.  It was the whole point of the establishment, welcome to reality.  Now either shut up and deal with it, or storm the fucking castle and get on with it.  Good luck to all parties involved, I really truly mean that.  If I am wrong, I will issue a formal apology/congratulations to all.  But I wont hold my breath, and neither should you.

Homeostasis

This is the first blog from my new laptop.  Yes, ladies and gents, The Jackie is back in action.  All in part to my lovely boo, Bill Blood.  The man keeps me sane and loved, what can I say?  I can say that my life is the shit, that's what I can say.  When I bought my one way ticket to New York City, with 3 friends, no job, no long term place to stay, and one hell of a "can do" attitude, I knew I was headed in the right direction. 


For so long in Los Angeles I felt unsure of everything.  I found out my lifelong best friend was a raggedy ass jerk. I couldn't decide if my grandparents were ready to be on their own.  My mom wrangled herself a sweet homestead.  I was just floating around from one bar to the next, one joint to the next, one party to the next, which I guess isn't too different than how I am now, then I just wasn't feeling to good about it.  All I was sure of was that I needed change. 


I have had a few points in New York where I thought, it just couldn't get better than this, and somehow it always does.  I'm not going to say that I wasn't a little depressed when I lost my job at Jerkface Motorworks, I wasn't really expecting it, and I got played out pretty bad, so it was understandable that I have done an acceptable amount of moping.  A part time job would be really helpful, something where I can serve semi-douchey people some coffee or used clothes or whatever.  Somewhere that will have me and not treat me like a bitch.  I don't ask for much.  


It makes me sound mostly-douchey for saying this, but I have had a bit of a hard time adjusting to not having a job and not worrying about it.  Sounds like everyones dream, yeah, yeah, I know all about it.  Now that I realize I'm not going to wake up from this dream, its growing on me kinda nicely, but at first, its a little bit shocking. I haven't not worked for almost a decade, minus the year I lived with my grandparents.  I felt totally, utterly, completely fucking useless.  Not bringing in my own money, absurd.  All of a sudden I got all feminist on myself, like, "Ain't no man gonna be takin' care of my ass.  No way, I'm independent, I got my own shit, I got my own clothes, I buy my own Metrocard."  I guess that's how I was raised, and it's not a bad thing, a girls gotta get her own in this world.  But, I have nothing to prove.  I already made it clear I could take care of myself, everyone knows it.  


This is no free handout though, let me tell you.  I am Housewife, USA right now.  Doing laundry, making breakfast, I'm getting domestic up in here.   I like it, I complain like Peggy Bundy, but I actually do what needs to be done, very well I might add, then whine about it later.  So far, so good.  We have quite the little household going on.  Me, Bill, Sage and Tyler have a good thing going here.  We are simple people, who have incredibly awesome lives.  And the best part is, it will still keep getting better than this.  I didn't know what I was looking for when I left LA, but I am pretty sure I found it.  


Okay, my Cheese Meter has reached capacity, but stay tuned for my next update.  Tuesday, The Jackie goes on location to Wall Street.  Guaranteed to be brutally honest, mostly offensive and entertaining for all.  

Civil Unrest

It's autumn in New York, so beautiful, so crisp.  The wind is blowing, and it seems to have brought with it an Occupation.  Everyone is up in arms and all up in the street.  I haven't actually gone down there to check it out, and this is for a number of reasons.  One of them being that I don't actually give a shit.  Sorry, I had to say it.  We all know this country is corrupt, everyone complains about it, constantly.  I complain a whole lot about people( well, maybe not as much "complain about" as "make fun of), but I figured the State of the Union was a tacit understanding between all of us.  It fucking sucks.  They take all our money, charge as up the asshole for EVERYTHING, cops and rich people get to do whatever they want, but it is what it is.  




Now before everyone starts getting all crazy, I also understand the need for change, and our rights, and free speech, all that.  I am just completely convinced that the people that the message is intended for, don't give a shit.  If any changes are actually made, they will be made in such a way that they will still get something out of it.  
So you go stomp around in the streets with your human microphone or whatever it is, hold up traffic, force the city to pay for even more cops to be out, arresting people who have to pay the city back more money...it sounds ridiculous to me.  As foul as this country is sometimes, we don't live in huts.  We have running water.  No genocide.  No bombings. Fertile land.   Who the fuck are we to protest anything?  




Another reason is that I do my best to stay under the grid.  I have as little to do with the government as possible, I do not do anything that will put me in contact with police, I do not have credit.  I am my own Revolution, and the best kind of revolution is an underground one.  Hollering in the streets "The World is Watching", yeah, they are, and I would rather they not see my face, thank you.  




I thought I was just apathetic, but on further consideration, I'm not.  I give a shit about something, I give a shit about myself.  I ain't afraid to say it either.  I give a shit about me, my friends, my family, thats it.  Fuck the government, fuck the media, be prepared.  I understand the unrest.  I really do, I've felt the unrest my whole life.  I have always questioned authority, I couldn't give a shit less about politics because I have never trusted any of it, even as a kid.  I have watched people get hopeful and disappointed at every election.  But everyone still keeps hope.  I guess I am just cynical, but I am also prepared.  You have to find away to survive and get by when the government continues to fail you.  Occupy yourself.




Everything is in such extremes right now, the whole world pretty much sits on the edge of their seats waiting for the shit to go down, but no one really puts too much thought into what that shit is.  This country would have to tear itself down before it could rebuild with this idealistic perspective everyone has in their heads.  Get over it.  The powers that be would blow dying ass Mother Earth up before they would let us actually have any rights.  So unless you are ready to go into full on apocalyptic survival mode, we are no where near change.  


I think we should be occupying our time, starting little tiny Revolutions every day.  Thats just me, and of course I could be wrong, that would make me an asshole, but at least we would be around long enough to prove it.


And on a side note, if this shit lasts long enough...I'll eventually have to go down to Wall Street and check it out.  Morbid curiosity and all.

Time to Fem Out

I usually try and refrain from speaking of the struggles of females, cuz well, that's what fucking Cosmo is for.  But, today I have encountered a few feminine obstacles.  I made the ever dreaded trip to Planned Parenthood.  In LA, this is more of a time wasting inconvenience, in NY, it is waiting in limbo hell to be systematically raped.  In order of arrival, of course.  

California, with all of its debt and flaws at least offers free reproductive care.  Free  birth control, pregnancy tests, STD screens, morning after pill, abortion consultation, etc.  Here, you  must jump through the flaming hoops of Medicaid approval.  I could not apply for free care without a birth certificate, social security card, proof of residence, AND a carefully worded letter from Bill stating that he is now financially responsible for me.  I brought all that, because I can follow instructions, and was told that I am still not eligible.  Um, what?  I am a young female with no fucking job, you want me to get knocked up? Is that it?  After quite a bit of persuasion, I was given a "sliding scale", which means I only had to pay $25 to see a damn Midwife.  I thought this included a lady exam and birth control.  Haha.  Yeah right.  $180 for an exam.  So what you are telling me Planned Parenthood of New York City is that not only do you want me to get knocked up, but you want me to be overflowing with syphilis and cancer? Neat-o.  Thanks for nothing.  I just don't understand how a booming city like NY can even think to not offer free birth control.  Instead they build the projects 90 stories high to house all the accidental children and syphilitic crackhead prostitutes.   Just sayin.  

Female obstacle 2 of the day is this new diet I'm forcing myself to do.  Some people don't like the term "diet", so to make you happy, I will refer to it as my "new lifestyle choice".  And by lifestyle choice, I mean, a choice to fit back into my fucking pants because I'm too broke to buy new ones.  I went to Trader Joe's and spent a good chunk of my remaining money on foreign and exotic foods.  Cucumbers, lettuce, asparagus, lean ground turkey meat, just to name a few.  Holy hell it is expensive to try and not be a fat ass.  Now I know why I was living off of Manwich and Mac and Cheese.  So not only am I having to buy foods that I never would have even thought to put in my mouth, but I have to fucking cook them.  MYSELF.  In a kitchen, with knives and fire, plus make them taste good.  Good grief.  I am not a very insecure person, and there isn't much I find to be outside the realm of being totally bad ass at, but I am going to go ahead and put cooking at the top of that list.  I just figured that in some primitive sense, I should just, you know, be good at it.  I am so insecure about it, that my first attempt at making something hasn't even finished its 2 hour simmer and I'm already convinced it sucks.

It took me a lifetime of chopping and browning and stirring and simmering and measuring before I could even leave it alone to do its thing, and now, after smelling it for 2 hours, I don't even want to eat it.  Is this how real life works? Is this why my grandma would spend all evening preparing something for my grandpa only to serve him and retire to her bedroom with a bowl of cereal? This shit is nuts.  It's fun because I have never done it (when not being specifically paid to do so), but a pain in the ass because I paid for all of it, and I have to eat it whether it comes out good or not. I find this part much harder than the actual diet.  I got up early(which means noon), made and ate my boring ass scrambled eggs and spinach, drank water, ate my measly Babybel cheese wheel for a snack, came home and had a proper salad, no problem.   But now I am here suffocating on chili fumes and wondering how many days worth the chili I'm gonna have to eat to feel like this shit was worth the time it took.  

This may not seem like a big deal to most people, but if you know me, you know that cooking and eating properly is like my equivalent of scaling Mt. Everest or some shit.  Something one puts on their list of things to do and swears they will do it someday, but don't.  Well folks, someday is here, and I am determined.  If this South Beach doctor guy has lied to me, I will be a fat ass forever, if not, I'll be fine as hell in a few weeks.  Time can only tell.  Good news though, according to Planned Parenthood, as of today I am 3 lbs lighter than I was 2 weeks ago.  If the anxiety from starting a diet can drop pounds, maybe the rest of this will be successful.

Cheezy, but just the beginning...

No one panic, but I lost my job a few days ago.  I regret not blogging about this job while I was excited about it, because you would have truly got the chance to see how much I put into it.  You also would have gotten to hear about the terrible decline as I realized just the kind of people I was employed by.  I could go on a rant about the lying, irresponsibility and downright shadiness I witnessed, but I wont.  Not because I don't think the world should know, I just know it wont make a difference.  They will be their own undoing, and I am relieved to not have to watch the ship go down.  And if by chance they make it, well, I wouldn't have wanted to be there to sell my soul to help.  

Now, I am unemployed, in a position where I don't have to get another job for awhile, and I've just been pacing around my empty apartment, not knowing what to do with myself.  I got the food that I wanted to eat today, started catching up on Breaking Bad, smoked some weed, a couple cigarettes, then almost had an anxiety attack on my fire escape.  I don't mean like, "I can't breath. I'm DYING!" type of anxiety...just, "Oh shit, what the hell am I gonna do with my life?" anxiety.  

I have been in New York for over 7 months, and I find myself in the oddest position.  Good, but just not somewhere I ever thought I would be.  I have a fucking amazing boyfriend.  I mean, not for nothin, he is just the best thing that has ever happened to me.  He now makes 3 awesome people whom I have built a home with that I just love to pieces.  We are cramped but cozy, and I can't say how fortunate I feel to have them all together in one place.  So, home is good.  

My mantra is that everything happens for a reason, and even though change is going to make me anxious, it is what it is.  For the first time EVER, I have the opportunity to just explore and figure out exactly what I want to do.  It is fucking fall in New York.  It is beautiful outside.  I can go for a walk, shop in the city, ride the train around and see where I end up.  Plus, I can write all about it!  No work drama, no home drama, just the beauty of life that I haven't gotten a chance to just sit around and enjoy for years.  Some people are never afforded this opportunity and I would be such a punk ass poser if I let it slip by me.  I don't know what I did in life, actually scratch that, all the bullshit I dealt with in life, brought me here, and I deserve it.  My dream of being able to just focus on writing has been realized, this Jackie may just make something of her self very soon.   Thank all of you who have stuck by and continued to follow along, even when I was being a jerk and neglecting this page.  

I am only on Day 2 of "Funemployment", so I am still doing the initial, sit around the house and relax stage, but I guarantee I will be bored of that by Monday.  So, this blog will now be my #1 priority.  I hope all this works out as well as I see it doing so in my head.

The Most Hyped Least Catastrophic Catastrophe

I have decided to bring my blog out of semi-retirement to give everyone the run down about the events surrounding this hurricane.  No one I know really has a television, so this storm was pretty much hearsay until about Friday afternoon.  I get to work and my bosses are losing their shit because we are located a mere blocks walk from the waterfront, and keeping up with their general preparedness for most things, lack flood insurance.  So with over a million dollars worth of motorcycles and equipment housed in our facility, I spent a large part of the day breaking the news to customers and moving shit off the floor.  Sand bags were brought in, supplies were purchased, and with my caring, empathetic heart, I grumbled about just hoping my damn vacation wasn't ruined.

I am not a particularly panicky individual (unless its a freaking earthquake, and then you had better get your kids out of my way because I will trample them to get to the door first..), but after they had announced the evacuation of millions of people from the city and decided to shut down the entire transit system at noon on Saturday, I started to take a little bit of notice.  More so because transit has only been shut down 2 other times in NY history, and that was on 9/11 and in 2005 when the metro workers went on strike.  So by take notice, I don't mean that I went and punched people in the face for the last pack of batteries or case of water,  I mean that I noticed the inherent flaws in this plan. 

Coastal areas were ordered to be evacuated by 5pm on Saturday evening, yet there would be no public transportation starting at noon.  Now I am no statistical analyst, but that just sounds retarded.  You want these people to get the hell out, but you are going to halt the one way that more than half of New Yorkers use to get around.  Okaaaaay.  Also, the amount of shelters provided by the city, wouldn't even be able to house a quarter of the people evacuated.  It might also be noted that a good deal of the evacuated were Housing Projects, people that most likely lacked the resources to find alternate travel or living situations.  Neat-o.   Any one ever hear the story of the Titanic??

Also, all airports were to be shut down at noon.  I thought I was in the clear, I had been earnestly clicking back and forth between Virgin Americas website and the status of JFK.  All flights were still a go as of 1 am.  JFK was to close its doors at noon, and my flight was scheduled at 11:45, so I assumed that we would be okay since the storm wasn't even estimated to arrive in NY until 2 am SUNDAY morning.  Well, its a good thing I decided to sit on hold with Virgin America for not one but TWO hours.  When a very frazzled gentleman finally answered my phone call, I was told all outbound flights from JFK were canceled from Saturday morning til Monday afternoon.  My usual response in situations like this is to yell and belittle the defensless phone monkey until I get my way, but he was genuinely apologetic and had probably been yelled at no fewer than 500 times that evening, so I spared him.  My flight was changed until Monday afternoon and we got comped 2 extra days so that my stay wouldn't be affected.  I guess thats the most I could squeeze out of Virgin, so I let it go.  Now all there was left to do was wait.

I woke up Saturday afternoon around 1 expecting some sort of pre-disaster storm action, and found that it wasn't even fucking raining.  It was almost 80 degrees and muggy as hell, but it sure didn't look like any of that would have stopped a plane from taking off.  Now I am pissed.  I also realize that because my boyfriend and I were planning on making a break for it during the storm, we were sorta ill prepared.  I still wasn't completely convinced the situation was going to be as bad as Mayor Bloomberg was making it sound, but if by chance, "they" were right, I didn't want to be caught with my pants down sans flashlight.  I made the call to my roommates who were in possession of beer, water and candles but without much food.  We had food and weed, and no beer and water, so we decided we should join forces.  We headed from Bill's house back to Bushwick where we were going to set up shop for Hurricane Party 2011.  

Now, I don't know if the media touched on it at all, but a New Yorkers sense of "preparation" largely consisted of fridges full of beer and water, and an apartment full of amusing company to wile away the night with.  Everyone seemed most concerned about weather or not this meant we all had the weekend off.  Alas, the ONE upside of transit shut down.  The perfect excuse.  We settled in for the long haul, checking updates via weather.com, posting at the window waiting for a hobo to fly by in a gale gust of wind, and waiting for some action, and waiting, and waiting, aaaaand waiting.  We had 2 pots of coffee, played made up drinking games, baked a cake for Sagey's Hurricane Birthday, and waited and waited some more.  I was still sore over my flight, so I was determined to be bitter until I saw some real catastrophe type shit.  As the hours wound down and 2 am approached, the wind was pretty hectic, the rain was coming down in sheets, but nothing close to the hype I was seeing on the interwebs.  Family was calling to make sure I was still alive, and I just yawned into the phone and smoked another cigarette on the fire escape.  Talk about anti-climactic.

I know it sounds amazingly retarded and selfish to say that I am a little disappointed to not have some crazy amazing story about how I survived Hurricane Irene, but its true.  The city spent some odd million dollars on this hype.  And as I learned from some seasoned New Yorkers, Bloomberg was mostly just covering his ass for the lack of judgment he showed during the major winter blizzards. I know they say "better to be prepared than blah blah blah", but I think the city could have went about this with a little less media driven frenzy and a little more...whats the phrase?? Oh yeah, common fucking sense.  We are an island, we are surrounded by water.  Isn't there some better precautions set into place to get us through something like this?? Los Angeles has spent millions of dollars making sure our city doesn't crumble into pieces during an earthquake, there is no way a seaboard metropolis can't get its shit together for a hurricane?  Absurd I say, absurd.  

So, even though this storm was probably much more exciting for those of you watching the footage on the blockbuster news from afar, it did afford all of us an unexpected day to hang out with good people, get drunk, stuff our faces and try our hand at conversation.  All in all, the most pleasant disaster I've ever encountered.  And my heart does go out to all of those on the eastern seaboard that get trampled by this hurricane, but maybe that will teach to you stop rebuilding houses in a town that gets consistently trampled by Mother Nature every season. And on that note, see ya Monday Los Angeles.   

The Best of a Bad Situation

Now don't get me wrong, I usually do not give 2 shits about the government, its exploits, or who it is they are deciding to kill this week, but announcing that we shot Osama Bin Laden, well, even I have to take notice.  I have had and heard so many mixed messages and feelings about this development, it kinda sucked the fun out of the story as a whole.  I assume that 99% of what comes out of the mouths of politicians, including our handsome President, is a sack of lies.  And I don't feel that this is any different.  Why would you go through all this trouble of crashing helicopters and special forces invading, then just dump the body at sea?? That's crazy.  As part of the Osama fairy tale, we were promised a bloody mutilated body, and we as a people wanted to see it.  Which brings me to my next point...

Ground Zero last night had me in awe.  I literally stood with my beer in hand, scanning the crowd with a slack jaw.  Every type of person you can imagine, and where did everyone get all these flags from??  The ignorance level of this flash mob was astounding, but that aside, it was nice to see people rally together for something.  The general feeling from the crowd was "Fuck Osama"...well, even if he is dead, I'm sure he still fucked us worse, and will continue to fuck us despite his body being at the bottom of the ocean...if that's where it is at all.  I would love to believe that this is the beginning of a new era, a time where America does what it says its going to do, where we move on past this tragedy and become better people and save the world.  We just got drunk in the streets, climbed on shit, and sang songs to celebrate the massacre of 4 men and a woman...looks like the same old era to me.

Also, the amount of people dedicated to Osama's leadership aren't going to give up their fight just because he's gone, I think it will make them fight harder.  And that just means more people are going to die, and a lot of them are going to be Americans.  Death does not literally equal justice, it just makes those that were wronged feel better.  Which I am fine with.  Those little girls at the rally who were crying because they lost a parent, or the firefighters holding up the jackets of comrades who died trying to rescue people as the towers went down, they needed to feel better.  And it isn't like our government is ever going to stand at a podium and say "Uuuh, well, you see, funny thing about those towers...".  Not gonna happen.  These people were afforded a time of peace and relief.  And the people in the military who keep getting sent back over seas can feel, for a moment, that its all going to be okay.  

I also believe that the only reason our government wanted to kill Osama so bad is because we are the ones that turned him into the covert killing machine he was.  We gave him the money, the weapons and the know how.  This was effectively putting the family pit bull to sleep after it turned and maimed someone in the family.  You brought the monster into your home, and now you realize its up to you to put it down.  Thanks for making this trillion dollar correction USA.  You will probably never hear a political rant like this from me again.  It is all bullshit.  Our government is bullshit, murdering in the name of justice is bullshit, and we are no better than they are.  I am glad that I got to witness a huge piece of history for this nation.  It felt good to be at ground zero and sing our battle anthem, and it felt good to see other people feeling good.  But this is not the end, and that scares me, and once everyone is done waving their flags and singing their praises to America, we should go right back to waiting for the other shoe to drop, because its inevitable.